February 12, 2012

Woe is me!

...A gruesome story.
By: KeKeJ
Editing by: Your's truly

Well, we were chatting on teh interwebz the other day. I started getting hyper and saying really funny things, which were probably only funny to us at the time. For instance, I made up this number: Porpskillion. It's a big number. Anyway, she decided that she was going to die from the giggles, and told this haunting tale....

"I (this is her talking) might never get over the giggles, you never know. And it will be all your fault, and you will come cry over my grave, and you will die from depression, but with a repentant heart...

You will say, 'Oh, if only I had never made KeKeJ laugh so much, none of this would have happened. Where did my life go so wrong? I wish I could undo the past... oh woe is me. Alas for sueth! I am troubled!'"

(I jump in, seeing that she fell into a trap and called herself troubled) "You are troubled!"
continuing...'Oh, woe is me, woe is me.'
"What is this? I hear a young merry voice." (referring to my joke about being troubled)

"Child! beware! Never make your friends laugh! It will be their undoing!
"You will be lone and lorn, and brought lower than the grave itself!"

'Oh, woe is me!
"And then you will go moaning and weeping through the streets, and become the terror of the town, with your hair torn, gnashing your teeth, and wailing. And then, once you're dead, a legend will be created about your ghost. Thousands will claim to have felt the touch of your icy fingers, and to hear you weeping on their doorstep. Others will claim to have seen you on the river bank, staring into the tormenting depths...at war with yourself."

" 'oh, woe is me!' they will hear you say. 'Woe, woe, woe unto me.' "

"Old ladies will talk amongst themselves...
'Is not this the very girl whom we used to speak to on occasion, and whom  we treated on an equal footing with ourselves? What has been her undoing? Where did her life go so wrong?'

Every Thursday night, at 2:17 am, you will be seen on the hill of my burial, wondering about, from grave to grave, but ever avoiding the sight of mine. Officers will try to catch you, but you are too nimble for them, even in your old age, darting about through the markers, weaving through the gloom until you make your escape.
None will no where you have gone. Folks will say you fled to France, but no reports have sprung from there. Only in (my city) do they remain, forever more. The story of you, wandering through the river banks, stumbling around the streets, scrambling about the town, wailing,'Beware the fate of me, the Great Undone.'

The End"

Isn't it sad?! I laughed for so long about this! I hope you can understand, as it did require a lot of editing! Please refer to me as the Great Undone and tell this story after I am dead. Thanks.

-Great Undone

3 comments:

  1. Oh wow. That's all I can say.
    -Lauren

    ReplyDelete
  2. I know. It was...strange. But fun!!

    I tried posting on your blog Lauren, on the P&P post, but it wouldn't let me! I was sad, because I had a lot to say!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Aw, weird! I'm sorry:( I have had so many comments on that post...lol:-) Feel free to try again!

    ReplyDelete

I love comments, just be nice and use correct grammar!